"You aren't in the position to be asking such questions. I've done so much for you. I've stood up for you, be by your side when nobody was there for you and I could've done the same with these kits. Do you even remember their names? One of them asks me everyday when your going to come back and cries everytime she talks about you. How can you not care about your own flesh and blood? I mean.. I suppose it's starting to make sense. You attacked me and I guess you had a gauge your anger to something else, like these innocent kits."

He was far gone, constricted by his anger and grief. All his worries and anger were melding together and now he was taking it out on Ash. "I don't know what you wanted to do by coming back. I don't care if you come back, but stay away from my kits. They aren't yours, you haven't been there for them like I have. Just stay out of my sight, or I don't know what I'll do."

Ash stood, tiring of the frivolities. If Spark was going to yell at her, her flesh and blood and perfect counterpart, "You have no right to tell me what I should be asking!" she said, feeling her claws twitch and slip from their sheathes like a snake sliding into a river. "You've always been the golden child, Spark! The best opportunities! The most talented, the most loved by all around you- I was just . . . just your sister. And every single time life gives you a new opportunity to be a better cat, like Midnight or that litter, or StarClan knows, my litter, you take it in stride! You and Aetos- you're always doing these things and having emotions, loving kits that aren't even yours. I'll be honest, Spark, I don't feel anything. All I feel is anger and you know how anger makes me act! And I never mean it- not even when I scarred you, Spark. Stoneteller made me. And he's gone now."

She started rambling, pacing back and forth on the border-line, "I came back to see how you were doing! You're right- I couldn't care less about those leeches, no more than I care about any other kit in the nursery. They aren't mine. I'm sorry, Spark, but they're not. That ****** of a cat forced me, and I couldn't run fast enough, didn't fight back. Those kits are the exact embodiment of everything I've tried to avoid. I had to run- before I killed them, accidentally- I don't have the instincts to be a mother. I'm glad they have you- you'll do a better job than I ever could. But I still want to know, I still want to see, still want to watch- it's a need. I-I don't want to be a part of their life, Spark, but EarthClan- EarthClan feels like home now, and I'm not going to let five little squealing mistakes keep me from it."

"I have every right to tell you! I don't know what your talking about being the golden child. I've gone through the same hardships as you and I wished to become something that our parents could be proud of, so I worked myself to the bone. I did everything I could for that ****** tribe. I'll say this once. They are my kits. You know how hard it is to grow up with no parents. I dont want that to happen to anyone and I will keep fostering whatever lost soul shows up at Earthclan, because it's my duty to make sure that every life has a chance, that they feel wanted. If you think that's so bad, then I don't know what to say to you."

Spark paused for a moment, shivering slightly at the mention of the Stoneteller. Memories all flooding back at once at the mention of the tom. Did she kill him? Like she almost killed me that one time? Are we no different in her eyes? "I don't care that cat forced you, Ash. I honestly don't, because of the way your acting. You remind me of a kit pitching a fit. The kits did nothing to you, they haven't harmed you in anyway. It's not there faults that they are a product of ****. You should wake up and realize that your grown, you need to stop playing the victim."

"While were on the subject I want to bring something up." Spark shifted slightly, eyes looking at the river beside them, he didn't believe Ash deserved the respect of eye contact and made it a point to not look at her in the eye. "I've done everything for you. I've been by your side, through thick and thin. Yet, if seems like I do nothing that is "acceptable" in your eyes. You got mad when I found Midnight and made her a part of our family. You got mad when I told you that Aetos and I were mates. You get mad about every single thing that I do and I'm tired. I really am. I'm done being the perfect big brother. I dont even think I can call you sister with everything you've done. I can't even get a sincere sorry. I'm tired of it all. I'm tired of you." 

Ash shouted now, her ears back and her teeth bared, "Are you even listening to me?" she shouted, louder than her mentor would ever allow her in the mountains, for fear of starting an avalanche. "I've tried so hard to adjust! I escaped the tribe, I came here- those are big changes! You want me to apologize? Fine- I'm sorry I couldn't adapt as quickly as you. I know that you know I've changed, even if it has been a little bit, for the better! I got used to you and Aetos being mates, I even talked to Midnight a little bit before I left- I'm not going to say I think you should've kept her, but the Tribe of Endless Hutning was in my head- And I'm not playing the victim either- I accept what I've done! I'm not even denying that I've done it!" she spat, finally stepping over the border so that she was closer, the two cats now no more than half a foxlength apart.

"Look at you, Spark! You can't even look me in the eye! Tell me, what gets under your skin more- the fact that I'm trying to come back or the fact that we decided to leave the tribe in the first place?"

"You apologies mean nothing to me, because I can still see in your eyes that they are fake. The thing is Ash, you act like you were the only pushed into this environment. We all were and to make it clear I was the one that left here on my own and you followed me. We didn't decide anything. You guys followed me here and I only came here because I heard the clans were completely different and I wanted to try this life out. So, don't blame this on me." Spark paused for a moment, his whole body language screamed exhaustion. He was burnt out, after worrying about all his kits and Ash. But he couldn;t bring himself to care for whatever happened to Ash now. She had done so much, but trying to kill the kits had crossed the line. 

Ash had selectively blocked the memory, but now it all came coursing back. The arguing. The anxiety. Ash had been different then- a sniveling coward, praying to get away from the tribe and all its customs and rules. To get away from Stoneteller. But that isn't what she was going to let Spark believe.

"I followed you here because I didn't want you to die some horrible death," she bit back, though not as hard as Spark had hit her with his venomous words, "You're the one that was off traipsing with your boyfriend while I was trying to figure out what to do with a pregnancy I didn't want. I needed support, Spark, and you were too heart-eyed in love with a cat you grew up with to care. So don't pretend you're so carefree either. I've done things- but so have you," she snapped.

Their screaming match seemed to be nearing its end, Ash noticed, as her throat was beginning to hurt from screeching. 

"I'm coming back to EarthClan, Spark. You can keep my kits, they're yours, I'll even tell them I'm not their mom. But I'm going to come back and you're just going to have to find some kind of way to live with it."

"You never came to us for help. How am I supposed to read your mind? Is that what your expecting of me? I would've helped you, but now I can't stomach seeing you, seeing as you tried to kill your own kits. You seem to have a knack of doing that huh? Attacking your flesh and blood?" Spark meowed with venom in his voice, but he paused when Time of Winder Solstice appeared, attacking much like a kit would. "What's this? You trying to make yourself seem better by fostering an overgrown kit? Your hilarious."

Ash of Dying Ember winced as Spark brought up the painful memories and it was all she could do to keep from vomiting at his paws. That was before Winter appeared, the tom's black pelt and starking white head standing out as he leaned against her. The tom was Ash's saving grace, her reprieve during the moons of unsure actions. He was wonderful, an outcast in a close-knit tribe, and they clung together like an eagle's down to a mossy nest. Ash glared at Spark as he approached, loudly, as usual, and she leaned into him, their body language anything but unsuggestive.

"He isn't a kit," Ash bit, parsing the syllables harshly on her small pink tongue. She looked into Winter's eyes and blinked slowly, letting him know he was safe- he would have a hard time figuring out what was going on between Spark and her until she could explain it to him, slower.

"This is my mate," she said, slower, letting her mouth form the words so Winter could more easily parse them, "Spark of Young Flame, this is my mate, Time of Winter Solstice. Time of Winter Solstice, this- this is my brother, Spark of Young Flame," Ash had unending patience for Winter and only for Winter, and she looked to Spark, daring him to say anything about the happiness she'd found.

"He acting like one." Spark simply said, doing all he could in his power to inflict wounds onto Ash, like she had done to him. He simply couldn't believe what was going on here. She had run off back to the tribes and found herself a mate in the little time she had been gone? He couldn't believe what he was hearing and witnessing. It appalled him greatly. 

"Mate or not, I dont want either of you around my kits. If you can't head my warnings, then I'll just have to have a talk with my claws instead." 

Ash's brow lowered dangerously as her golden eyes became overcast with hatred- she hoped Winter wouldn't judge her too harshly for what she was about to do. The small she-cat, though heavier than Spark from the muscles that rippled underneath her short, scruffy, thick white pelt, took a pawstep forward, coming nose-to-nose so that Winter wouldn't see her lips move and decipher what she was about to say.

"He's deaf, Spark," she said slowly, tensing each syllable over terse muscles and tenacious teeth. "I regret what happened between me and you so badly, but know that I will not hesitate to act on you if you act on me. I won't talk to your kits- or mine - so long as they don't talk to me first. I won't speak to Aetos. I won't talk to Midnight. ****, I won't even look at you, if that's what this takes, but EarthClan has been made my home too. And I'm bringing Winter with me- do not try and take him away," she stood tall for a long moment, her short tail flagged and dangerously still over her short, curving back. Gold met silver, a battle of will. Ash didn't know whether he would back off or fight back- she didn't know which one she wanted more.

Spark's silver eyes didn't even blink and he remained composed, not moving a muscle when Ash came nose to nose with him. Spark was lean and small with wiry muscles visible under his pelt. He had been a prey-hunter while living with the tribe cats and his built was perfect for any type of hunting. Although being a hunter for the most of his live, he was limble and fast, making him deadly when coming up against stronger, bulkier cats.

"I don't care. I've done everything for you and you've never appreicated any of it. I'm tired. Just leave me and my family alone." Spark simply said, holding her gaze for a couple heartbeats, before moving away.  

Ash turned back to her mate, mouthing loudly with her words as she faced her mate. She didn't need to, but she made the syllables hurt, her back turned to Spark just as she knew he had on her. "It's alright now," she said, "He is leaving us in peace." The she-cat moved to nuzzle the strong Winter, her bobbed tail deceptively lowered.